Feeling down more often than usual? If you’re finding it harder to shake off feelings of sadness or hopelessness, menopause might be playing a role. For many women, menopause can bring about not just physical changes, but emotional ones too—sometimes leading to depression. Let’s dive into what’s happening, why it’s happening, and, most importantly, what you can do to feel a little bit more like you again.

Just as life starts to change in significant ways—like your kids becoming more independent or your parents needing more of your support—your hormones decide to join in on the chaos. You may finally feel ready to start a new chapter, but then menopause enters the mix, bringing a real emotional and physiological firestorm.

You’re not crazy. Perimenopause and menopause cause biological changes that can significantly affect your mental health. You’re also not alone: It’s extremely common to experience depression before, during, and after menopause, especially if you’ve dealt with depression in the past or if life’s current challenges are particularly heavy.

The main culprit is your hormones, particularly oestrogen. As you go through menopause, your oestrogen levels start to fluctuate and eventually decline. Oestrogen plays a significant role in regulating mood, and when its levels drop, it can lead to feelings of sadness, anxiety, and even depression.

But it’s not just about hormones. The changes in your body, the stress of aging, and the life transitions that often coincide with menopause—like children leaving home, caring for aging parents, or retirement—can all contribute to these emotional shifts. It’s a perfect storm of physical and psychological changes that can leave you feeling overwhelmed.

Yes, it’s completely normal to feel down during menopause. In fact, studies have shown that women are more likely to experience depression during perimenopause (the transitional phase leading up to menopause) and menopause than at any other time in their lives. For some, this might be the first time they’ve ever dealt with depression, while for others, it might worsen existing symptoms.

According to the North American Menopause Society (NAMS), about 23% of women going through perimenopause and menopause report mood changes. Research even points out that a persistent feeling of sadness or downheartedness is one of the most common manifestations of menopause.

It’s not just hormones that can trigger feelings of depression during menopause. The emotional weight often stems from a combination of factors: lack of sleep, sexual issues, and body image concerns. Additionally, this stage of life may bring other significant stressors, such as coming to terms with the end of your childbearing years, dealing with infertility, facing changes in your marriage, or coping with aging parents who may be sick or passing away. All of these challenges can compound and contribute to a deeper sense of sadness or depression.

Depression during menopause can manifest in different ways. Some women experience classic symptoms of depression, while others might notice more subtle changes in their mood and behaviour. Here are some signs to watch out for:

• Persistent Sadness or Hopelessness: Feeling down most of the time, even when there’s no obvious reason.
• Loss of Interest or Pleasure: Losing interest in activities you used to enjoy, whether it’s a hobby, spending time with friends, or even sex.
• Changes in Sleep Patterns: Struggling to fall asleep, waking up frequently during the night, or sleeping too much.
• Fatigue: Feeling constantly tired, even after a full night’s sleep.
• Difficulty Concentrating: Trouble focusing on tasks or making decisions.
• Irritability or Anxiety: Feeling on edge or easily frustrated.
• Changes in Appetite: Eating more or less than usual, sometimes accompanied by weight gain or loss.
• Feelings of Worthlessness or Guilt: Harsh self-criticism or an overwhelming sense of guilt.
  

If you’re experiencing several of these symptoms and they’re interfering with your daily life, it’s time to take action. Depression isn’t something you have to live with—it’s something that can be managed and treated.

While it might feel overwhelming, there are ways to manage depression during menopause. Here’s what you can do to start feeling like yourself again:

Talk to Someone:
Whether it’s a friend, family member, or therapist, talking about what you’re going through can be incredibly therapeutic. Sometimes just getting things off your chest can make a world of difference.

Consider Therapy:
Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) has been shown to be particularly effective in treating depression during menopause. A therapist can help you develop coping strategies, challenge negative thoughts, and find new ways to manage your emotions.

Stay Active:
Exercise is a powerful mood booster. It doesn’t have to be anything intense—simple activities like walking, yoga, or dancing around your living room can help release endorphins and improve your mood.

Practice Self-Care:
Take time for yourself every day, even if it’s just for a few minutes. Whether it’s reading a book, taking a bath, or practicing meditation, these small acts of self-care can make a big difference in how you feel.

Hang Out with Positive People:
Surround yourself with friends who lift you up and understand what you’re going through. Spending time with supportive people can help improve your mood and remind you that you’re not alone in this journey.

Say Nice Things to Yourself:
Be kind to yourself! Instead of harsh self-criticism, try rephrasing your thoughts. For example, instead of saying, “Menopause has made me into a monster!” try, “This hormonal rollercoaster isn’t going to last forever—I will get through it.” Taking back control can help lower your emotional temperature and help you cope with daily stressors.

Drink Less Alcohol:
While a glass of wine might feel like a quick fix for stress, alcohol is actually a depressant that can interfere with sleep and increase depression symptoms over time. It’s also a known hot-flash trigger. Instead of reaching for a nightcap, try meditation or a warm bath with lavender bath salts or your favourite calming shower gel.

Watch Your Diet:
What you eat can impact how you feel. Try to maintain a balanced diet rich in fruits, vegetables, whole grains, and lean proteins. Avoid excessive caffeine, sugar, and alcohol, as these can worsen mood swings and anxiety.

Prioritise Sleep:
Sleep and mood are closely connected, and menopause can wreak havoc on your sleep patterns. Create a calming bedtime routine, avoid screens before bed, and make your bedroom as comfortable as possible to improve your chances of getting a good night’s sleep.

It’s important to remember that you’re not alone in this. Many women experience depression during menopause, and it’s okay to reach out for help. Whether it’s talking to a healthcare provider, joining a support group, or confiding in a friend, reaching out can make a significant difference in how you feel.

If you ever feel like the depression is too much to handle or if you’re having thoughts of self-harm, please seek help immediately. There are people who care about you and resources available to support you through this challenging time.

While menopause can be tough, it’s also a temporary phase in your life. With the right support and strategies, you can manage the emotional ups and downs and come out the other side stronger and more resilient. Remember, taking care of your mental health is just as important as taking care of your physical health. You deserve to feel good, inside and out.